Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand

Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand
Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand

Wednesday, February 15, 2012

SPITE: it always comes back to bite you in the Petunia!

So, for whatever reason, Sundays, when Baynard is out on the road is the hardest day of the week.
I am not sure if it is the change in routine, if it is the "I'm bored to no return", or if it is that pent up anxiety of "I have been good all week and now I need to let the naughties out!"

Nanna had a rough day. well, more like I had a rough day dealing with Nanna and her shenanigans. The final straw was when she went into the bathroom, spray painted my walls with hairspray and then proceeded to take a bath... in the tiny sink that already has issues, it backs up big time. I was mad when there was a huge puddle of water that was dripping out of the overflowing sink that was full of bubbles. There was an empty can of hairspray and another empty bottle of shampoo over.
You have seen the movies where the washer or dishwasher has bubbles flowing out of it? well, this rivaled it.
I was mad.  OK... I was downright angry. she was sent to her room.
then pulled out of her room and told to clean it up.
When I realized this was making it worse, again I yelled at her and sent her back to her room. I am sure I said many more words, but the last thing I remember saying in my tantrum was, "If you aren't a big enough girl to stay out of things that don't belong to you then you are not a big enough girl to go potty by yourself! I am going to lock the bathroom door and when you need to go, you have to ask me so I can babysit you while you go potty!"
OK, so now? it sounds funny that it was so unreasonable, but i was frustrated and desperate.
I had just finished the words, clicked the lock, shut the door.
OH CRAP! the bathroom door has a key lock!
So... I am frantically looking for the key. whew! there are 8 keys here. they match the 4 interior locks that we have. this wont be as bad as I had thought.
the key would go in fine, it wouldn't turn the barrings to unlock the door.
Maybe i could pick the lock?
No. I was never any good at picking key locks. I could do some combination locks, but not key locks.
Perhaps I could take off the hinges? Nope.... wrong side of the door.
At this point, desperate times call for desperate measures.
I pull out Baynards 4lb hammer and proceed to smash the crap out of the door knob.
I did a really good job with the knob itself, but the shaft with the lock? Not a dent.
I continued pounding for a good hour.
Well, at least we have the bathroom downstairs. It will have to do for tonight.

The next day, I resumed taking out my anger on the door knob. it was bending, but still the lock on the cheapest door knob money could buy, would not be broken!
I called my friend who used to be able to pick locks really well.
there was enough damage done to the internal parts that it wouldn't be picked.
I hated to tell Baynard. I didn't was the "irresponsibility lecture".
My friend pounded on the door for nearly an hour. She was finally able to break it free. the door for the most part remained in tact. there was just one slight hammer head dent.
I called Baynard and told him that I had killed the bathroom door knob, but that it had put up a valiant fight.
He then informed me that he had switched the bathroom door knobs. the key to that door was downstairs in the utility drawer.
I swear I heard the tone, "Wha Wha WhaAaAa". ...

So, I am looking at the bright side. at least it wasn't when one of the kids were locked in there!  Or.... maybe it wasn't?

Spite... It will always bite you in the petunia!

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