Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand

Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand
Nanna Banana holding daddy's hand

Thursday, September 1, 2011

Another court date

again, I haven't posted in a while. Things have been crazy busy!
Buggy Boo had an ear infection, resulting in multiple Dr. visits. 4 was at the doc with sinus, but doc wasn't worried. At least not as worried as I am.  7 Started school, and Nanna? well... She is Nanna. LOL
On top of all that, I continued to be sick.
Headache, sinus, and coughing like I was hacking up a lung. If I was a smoker, I would swear that I needed to quit. I had also had low grade fevers, and occasional vomiting.
I am beginning to feel better though. I am just left with this stabbing pain in my eyebrow. It gets awful. Ibuprofen and the steroids I am already on, but increased dose seems to be helping a bit.

I am up late, I am sure it is worry. Tomorrow (well, this morning) is the day of court. I am pretty sure the judge is going to grant 4 and 7 go back with their family. I will miss them horribly, but know that the judge has their best interest at heart and our belief has always been that what is supposed to be is meant to be. Of course, the one thing I have learned through my girls is that its not over until it is over. There is a possibility that the judge could say, "sorry family, you have your own issues, permanency next hearing, Ms Barnum, are you willing to adopt?" but my gut is telling me that isn't going to happen.

I am thinking that the judge is going to tell me that they have 2 hours to get their stuff together and that they are headed with family.

In some ways, the lack of transition would be good, I think it would be easier for 7 to transition that way so that he isn't overly stressed, but 4 will struggle I think.

It was hard to tell the boys, but I felt it would be easier coming from me that our straight forward speaking caseworker. Plus, I have told them I would never ever lie to them. I did tell them that no matter what happens, it is totally up to the judge and that it is no decision of ours. I also told them that no matter what happens, they will always have each other. I hope the court don't make a liar out of me there, either.

I hate changes like this. It is the not knowing that is stressful, I think.